Tuesday, August 22, 2006

confused again

Yet again, a post about how confused I am with what I want to do.

I feel like I am talented, yet when I sit down to scrapbook I freeze and my pages don't turn out as good as I know I could make them. It is so frustrating. I have been e-mailing some well-known scrapbookers to see if they have any advise for me. I got a response today from Tracy Kyle and she said that it is a really hard industry to get into now a days.

It's not like I think I am going to be the next Elsie Flannigan or Ali Edwards. I just want to be in the industry somehow. I would love to work for a scrapbook magazine, even if my pages aren't published in it.

Am I being silly to think I can make a career in the scrapbook industry? Should I be trying to be something else? I don't want to be a cashier at a scrapbook store for ever... but what else am I going to do?

I just want to make art, and for people to appreciate it.


T-Bone said...

Hi Alice,

Leigh-Ann's husband Tyson here. I have a horrible habit of offering my opinions to people I barely know. However I do know how you feel as I lived in that mood for 5+ years, only being able to gain perspective in the last 6-7 months. I suffer from depression and am currently medicated (proving my continuing theory that i'm a looney).

I hope to offer you a word or two that has helped me.

1) You always have a choice.

Every day you make thousands of choices, you choose to get out of bed, to show love to your boyfriend and dog (the dog is very cute by the way)and millions of other insignificant and important decisions.

The decisions you have made, have brought you to where you are, a cashier at a scrap store. I'm a security guard, I make 9.55 an hour, but I would give it up to work minimum wage at my favorite book store, as I love to read and hope to write someday.

2) This is not the end.

As far as I know, as Leigh-Ann has told me, you went from Micheals to Clippers, you made a step towards your dream, keep it up, no you are not meant to be doing what you do now for the rest of your life, but you have to start somewhere, I am an old man of 25, but still I realize that I have so much time ahead of me, for paths that will unfold as I follow them.

You are a talented person, but rome was not built in a day, "enjoy the process". Life has a way of bringing about choices everyday.

So keep going, explore your talent, and do now what you can, i.e. get a job at a nice craft store like clippers.(sarcasm, another unfortunate quality of mine)


P.S. Leigh-Ann Says Hi
and she approves this message.

.freckled.nest. said...

hi--- lol. he leaves longer messages than me! hope he encourages you like he encourages me. Alice-you can go far with this! keep pushing towards your dream, and let it unfold, i can't wait to see our faces in CK fresh face. in time.
LA *hugs*
PS> Tyson says hi. lol.

alice valentine said...

wow. you guys made me cry! Thank you for encouraging me, it really means the world to me. You are both such amazing people, from what I have read so far. I hope that some day I can meet you both.

Anonymous said...

Alice life is short and if your not doing somthing you love it's a waste. Your still young and you have lot's of time to persue your dreams. Almost every famious person says that people always told them they would never make it but they did and so can you. Just do your best to stay positive. I'd rather pay the bills and you be enjoying life, than both of us be miserable. You know as well as I do that when your depressed I get sad to. Just don't give up your dreams without a fight.
From you know who.